I am currently frustrated like ASDFGHJKL. I’ve always been a frustrated photographer which is why I have my SLR with me which is a first and graduation gift from my Dad. I mean, I love it. But it has some issues now. The lens were kind of loose and I have to do the manual focus because the auto focus ain’t working so well. Furthermore, I’ll be needing a camera for video purposes which will come handy when I reach my senior year as it will be badly needed. I am considering of selling my camera which I’d probably sell at 9k-10k since it’s been with me for at least 2 years and like what I said, it ain’t smooth sailing plus it will be a second hand to the buyer. I also checked the prices online and they kind of offer the same amount or for some even higher. The charger and battery are still awesome so no worries about that. Anyhow, I really am considering of either buying a Canon which is my frustration or Nikon 5100D. I already checked the specs and prices. Canon are really pricey and considering the specs and the price, I’m considering on having the Nikon 5100D which would cost 21,500php at Hidalgo and maybe around 30k at the different camera house. 

I am frustrated that I cannot buy the camera I want without selling my first ever DSLR. I am frustrated that I do not have the money, that I cannot take good photos and my frustration over photography gets stronger again :| Huhu. I do not know what to do. I want to take good photos. I want a new cam, but I cannot have it all :( Okay. Life sucks. Ugh. HELP!!

Yesterday was Valentines Day and I had so much fun with my college friends. But it’s not about them, it’s about what happened after all the fun. I greet my closest friends at BBM, Happy Valentines day and wishing them nothing but happy hearts when Jayjay replied and things turned upside down.

Of course, being the best friend I always am, I wish and hope he could find someone new; someone worth his love and attention. He replied back and said, all he could digest right now are flings like the one with his DP. Then all of a sudden, he asked me if ever there was a point that I had a crush on him. You know me, I go with the flow of conversation and I do not see the point of lying afterall, everything is in the past already. I said, “yes, before” and why would I miss the opportunity to ask him the same thing which eventually he said “yes” too. But what struck me was when he said, “concern kasi ako sa’tin”, because it felt like it was 2011 again. If you know what I mean.

I was stunned. I cannot find the words. And somewhere, it left me wondering, “what if”. What if our timings matched. What if we were brave enough to let each other know what we feel. What if we tried, would it work, or would it not? What if he was first boyfriend, and I’d be his second girlfriend? How different could things turned out? How happy, sad, annoying, crazy, fun, would have our relationship be? Is it possible that we’d still be together or are we not friends anymore?

Too many questions. Because there’s too many what ifs, what could have been. Now, I regret it. I regret now having the courage, not having the guts to let him know.

Just now, I messaged him again, hoping to find company as I want to watch Safe Heaven tomorrow but according to him he has a family outing. I could not reply, “it’s okay” because I’m not. I have to be honest from now on. I have to be true to myself. I have to be strong willed like what I am with CJ’s case. 

And you know what, I started to cry when he said he could not come. Was it because I am disappointed? I am rejected? Could be because last year, I was rejected like this also? I DO NOT KNOW. Tears can’t help from falling, I am silently crying. Deep inside, I am screaming, I feel like my heart is falling apart, but yeah, it’s part of life.

I was and will always be friend zoned. Will I ever have luck on love? Will I ever find the man I am destined with? Will I ever be love in return? Or am I going to continue living a hopeless romantic life I am currently living in? 

I am in no way someone professional in the field of basketball. I am simply a fan, a supporter of this sport for the longest time I could remember and just someone new in the NBA because this is the first season I’ve watched this league closely. So, what you’re about to read is something that’s from a fan’s perspective. From a Rajon Rondo fan, specifically.

So, are the Celtics better off without Rondo? Oh yeah, I’ve read tons of articles about this. I’ve heard different sides from the experts perhaps and I’ve seen the stats. If I will look on paper, I’d say “yes” they’re probably better without Rondo. So let’s trade him, do I hear, Knicks, Lakers, Clips, Thunders, Heat maybe, anyone? Kidding. 

Now seriously, I do not consider the Celtics being better without Rondo but rather I’d consider them as a rejuvinated team. Why? Because now they are performing to the best of their capacity. I guess, what Rondo’s injury brought to the team is the thinking that their backs are not against the wall. They do not have someone depend on inside court. They do not have someone who will handle the ball and create plays for them. Now, they have to pass the ball around, shoot when they can and give a shot to every opportunities because no one will get the rebound out of nowhere, nobody will facilitate inside and probably no one will make an easy look for KG and Paul. I guess that papers proves these. Everyone is now having their fair share in the team. The Guards which the team has a number are performing well. Barbosa’s stepping up, Courtney’s running, Terry’s comfortable with his shots and helping the team with his leadership and Avery is still dependable on defense. Jeff Green is rising up to the occassion, filling in those necessary defense and offense not to mention how he has been terrific with those monstrous dunks. Ever consider being at the All Star? Paul being Paul; shooting, rebounding and now, yes, he has taken the role of being a major facilitator. KG’s still KG, doing his thing of being the defensive and aggresive player he already is. Which gives rise to Brandon Bass and Chris Wilcox as Sully is also out the entire season. The injuries brought the Celtics together maybe because of inspiration or perhaps determination to prove and hold on to their pride.

Celtics will enter the playoffs, I am 90% confident right now. This team is no joke because they have the talents. The problem before was that everything was cored to Rondo because the leadership was passed unto him, but the other guys could play. The reason why Rondo pass the ball, and is very self giving towards assists is that he wish to help his team become better with his thinking that allowing them to shoot would rather help. But, I think when he comes back, and maybe as he watch his team play right now, he’d realize that it’s not always about the passing. Rondo’s shooting has improved this season, being the 3rd in FG % among the guards and he must believe in himself that he can. He’s actually the guy that’s very unpredictable because he can just score 28’s but sometimes he’d only score 6’s. He will need to show consistency when he comes back. But, aside from Rondo, I guess the team itself was not used to the very tricky and spontaneous play of Rondo. So, yeah, maybe the usual basketball is better for the team.

I think I have answer the question already. And yes, I am definite about it. The Celtics are not really better off without Rondo. The players admit it, close games like that of the Clippers and Raptors kind of make them wish Rondo was there. And, I don’t know, I’m just up for a trade if they think that they are better without Rondo. The Celtics has a history of letting their key players be traded, remember what happened to Perk. It maybe an old story of the past but with ACL, the treatment and with the history of the Celtics actually Ainge, anything is possible. Believe me.

PS: I made this before the game against the Nuggets last night. But I still stand for my opinion. Though I must say I am impressed and admired the way Paul, Terry and KG steal that win.